Dear Republican Party:

Please make up your minds.

Was the Democratic convention:

• a smokescreen, presenting a highly palatable, almost-conservative face to the country that conceals Democrats' black, black hearts? [Most right-wing commentators]
• a hateful, four-day hate-filled hatefest, revealing Democrats' black, black hearts for all the world to see? [Mary Matalin, Front Page Mag & others]

Also: is your party Against Regulations and their Interference With The Market, or are you up for mandating flex-time for multitudes of employers? Even The Corrupt ABC Note is scratching its head over that one:

3. How are we to comprehend the Notion that the candidate who is running on a platform asserting that he is for limited government — and the other guy is for big, Washington-knows-best programs — is out there touting a new plan for flex time for workers so parents can go to Little League games?

Even though the campaign and White House have offered up no details whatsoever about how this plan would work, Mr. President, we wonder how having such a thing done from D.C. can possibly be consistent with your vision of limited government. (Of course, there IS that farm law and that Medicare law . . . )

Here's the quote from Bush's speech:

We'll help American families keep something they don't have nearly enough of, and that's time, time to be with your kids, time to take care of your elderly parents, time to help yourself by education. Congress needs to enact what we call comp-time and flex-time, to help American families better juggle work and home duties. (Applause.)

Talk about meaningless, kitchy-coo promises. While you're pulling policy proposals out of your ass, how about giving every new baby chocolate eclair? "Who's gonna vote wepubwican, wittle baby? You! Yes, you are.. yes, you are!"

Hey, let's ask Wall Street what they think about that kind of expensive new coercive regulation. I bet they'll love it!